im in a car with my best fiends, two surfboards, a tub of cookies and a flannel shirt. its a school day, im skipping and its amazing. dont you wish you were 16?

so i just registered my phone so now i can blog from it. this is pretty fucking exciting. mainly because now ill have something to do while im at school...

what the fuck is family?

i dont understand why i have to be the most adult and responsible member of my family. My m and d go at each other constantly, its ridiculous. theyre always threatening to get divorced and shit. and my dad is always saying hes gonna leave. and my 13 year old brother is so stupid and violent.

agh. i hate it.

i always have to interfere when theyre going at it because they have no common sense...

i dont like your girlfriend

ok.

so the guy that im currently going out with (ill call him 'john') is really great and all, but i dont know. at the beginning of this summer, i met him at my friends' party, and it was like one of those times when you meet someone and you're like "hey i feel like i've known you forever and i like you already". but he had a girlfriend, cate, so i backed off. but then he broke up with her, because cate is a huge bitch, and we sorta started seeing each other. it wasn't anything formal, but it was still a thing nonetheless.

so then one day, out of the blue i get this text message saying that he need to talk to me. weird. so i call him and he tells me that some girl that he'd had a crush on forever really liked him, and he was gonna go for it.

i was fucking shocked.

i really couldn't believe it because the day before he was going on about how much he liked me and how great i was and so on. it was seriously out of nowhere. but becuse i'm so chill, i got over it pretty quickley.

but then he started going out with super bitch cate again. i mean this is the girl that john openly admitted to hating! well, that lasted like a month, and then about one month ago, john started texting my best friend donna about how much he missed me and how he can't get over me. so i confronted him and was like"you cant do this. you have to make a fucking decision and stick to it!"

well he (finally) picked me. but now im not so sure that i can trust him. he's like a cute, lovable golden retriver, because if you throw a ball, then the dog'll go after it, but if you have a squaky toy in the other hand, then he's all about the other toy. he can only focus on and like what's directly in frount of him at the moment.

i guess i cant really do anything... but i wish i could...

needy friends

agh. i am such a fucking fantastic friend. my "friend" annie was dumped by my friend zack, a week before school started. even though its been like 3 months, she still cries over him every day. every goddamn day. i would know. she seems to save up all her tears, bitching, complaining and sob stories for me. like today? yah i spent all lunch period listening/watching her cry and obsess over zack. i had to deal with that yesterday too.

i don't know what im supposed to say. what do you say to someone who wont listen? no matter how much i explain to her that she needs to focus on herself, not zack, and she needs to get over it, she just doesn't fucking get it. all she does is cry. i think that if i collected all her tears for one week, it could provide enough water for a year for a town in kenya. no lie. its like other people have emotions and feelings- annie just cries.

whatever. im done dealing with this.

so...

so i'm really not entirely sure how this is going to go because i've never kept a blog or anything like that before. oh first of all, i never capitalize, and i don't have very good spelling, so bear with me. and also, i really don't know if anyone out there is going to read this... i mean i hope so, but who knows.

so, about me, im a junior in high school (im sixteen), and i do lots of stuff. im on the swim team (i suck, but its whatever), im in the spanish club, the beta club, and im on my twelfth year of playing the violin. thats actually, really the only thing that im good at. which is a bummer because i hate it so much. also, im working on becoming a model. im saying this at the risk of sounding naive and stupid, but this is a serious thing for me.

agh ive got lots of problems and stress in my life... mostly because my mum is a crazy psycho control freak bitch. not even kidding. i hate my family because they are ridiculous- whatever i dont need them. my mum is under the (wrong) impression that i have an eating disorder. it really pisses me off because i eat so much, and yah i am skinny but not like that!

and im a perfectionist, so i feel this need for everything in my life to be just so- or i freak. not really a great characteristic. also, i take super hard classes at school, and im getting straight a's.

well thats me...

for right now at least.